things really happen when you least expect it.

this morning wake up go eng tuition. walao eh.. this teacher damn r0x0r. shes suppposedly 68.. budden dun look and talk like 68 year old woman lor. shes indian, btw. and shes like, can talk to me abt anyth la. and her eng also pro as hell. when listen to her talk muz think twice de. her lang damn chim xD just talk talk a bit can come out all sorts of chim word de.. u got talk to mellissa neo b4? this teacher more hardcore than mel xD

then i received an sms from my mum. "after ur tuition we go kuishinbo eat lunch =D" i was like *mouth wide open* ooookay. so i decide to stay home today and mug for my chi prelim that just ended yesterday, and my parents decide to go to suntec and bring us all along xD things happen when u least expect it. so i had lunch at kuishinbo. power. eat until tonite dunnid dinner le. i'm not gonna eat dinner xD they were giving out mochi ice cream!!! but only to first 20 customers to reach the dessert table -.-; so.. classic s'porean response. flood the dessert table until ppl cannot pass lor. i got nuthin to say. i was going to get drinks, and i see this billion ohm "resistor" in my way. LAME.

and i went DRUMMING!!!111oneone. wahaha.. darn. star factory suntec's dm V is in terrible shape. the snare and ride cymbal's pads are like, so unsensitive.. muz hit damn hard just to get it to respond lor. so i failed timepiece phase II not once, not twice, thrice!! *dies* coz when i play timepiece phase II its like i barely even tap the cymbals, and when i tap these they dont respond. then when i see the "miss" i go like.. darn. then i miss the next few. its a chain reaction, yaknow? so i fail even before the part i'm weak in.. ><

then went searching for tennis shoes. my current one, according to my dad.. "makes you play like clay court on a hard court" which means, i'm slipping on every chance i have to slip. my shoes ain't even that worn out yet o.O; so went adidas. i wanted the a3 pair.. but they sorta kept slipping out at the back.. even when the length of the shoes was just right. darn. so i went to get a nike pair i wanted the federer pair.. but no size larger than 10. my size happens to be 10 half. its like someone's just preventing me from getting a good pair of tennis shoes. so i got another pair, with the colours just right inversed from the federer pair (ie. blue become white, white become blue) and its cheaper too xD so i took that pair, and ran off with it. after paying =P

then i come home. and i'm totally like. exhausted. but i wanna go out again xD i'm going drumming again next sat!! WHEEEEEEEEEEE. its my brudda's bdae xD next wed, i mean. we're celebrating it for him on sat tho =D

monday's a public hol!

xoxo;
4:23 pm

whee! prelim over. now i gotta get ready for english prelim. 27th may -.-; anw, dun wanna talk abt it ba. wait for results to come out then say xD it wasn't thaaaat bad. nv study still can get B if i'm nt wrong =p

hrm. ever felt like crying but cant? its like the tears are welling up behind your eyes and you can feel them squeezing against the back of your eye.. but nothing comes out. well, theres two ways to solve this.. let the tears out, or wait for it to slowly drain away. i chose the latter. but i think letting them just flow out would be much faster..

dreams are nice, but that's all that they are. stay in them for the nite but forget it once the night's over. a new sun rises after falling, the moon still stays for a while to remind you that the new isn't all what the old isn't. the stars fade to give way, and white clouds take the place of the orange ones of yesteryear. study and learn from the mistakes of the past, but forget the actual events and the emotions. grab a new canvas, begin a new painting. you improve with every new one.

oh, btw, anyone noticed the new skin? xD c'mon, give comments! my tagboard's there for someone to use, and if it isn't the people who visit my blog then i dunno who xP btw, i did it yesterday nite. when i was supposed to be studying my chi xD i sorta gave up studying halfway and began my quest on a new skin. couldn't concentrate yesterday nite.. sorta like my attention span ytd died on me xD well, at least the paper wasn't so hard, so i'm not regretting. yet. ^^;

michelleeeeeeee!!! thx for my previous skin =D the my chemical romance thingy totally rawked. totally as in.. totally. xD goth = niiiice xP

sigh. prelims over but i still have tuition tmr -.-; not to mention i'm not going anywhere tmr.. BORING! someone save me from my boredom before i do something funny.

*takes mr bean videotape*

=D

xoxo;
1:28 pm

10.40pm update - new skin!! =D comments anyone?
________________________

reached home at 11..

lessee. its been an exciting half day. no really. -.-;

ss in the morning wasn't half bad. danny was damn funny (and lame) as usual.

then chinese came. omg.. first thing. tmr's prelim, and goh hock meng has to choose to go somewhere at this time. this perfect time. k la. at least he came and gave us his hp no so we can call him if we need help. honestly i dont think that would help. then ok lor. chinese no teacher rite. we go library.. as usual. 20 mins after reaching library i receive an sms "quick come my class now or tio kan" it was from 4-2. i was like O.o; okok. faster go 4-2. an old hag was in there taking attendance. and worst thing was that some of the 4-8 ppl were actually in 4-2 classroom saving theirselves. talk abt class spirit. we go in and explain why we nv go. "qing zhan zai wai mian. xie xie."

damn xie lao shi. no wonder until now still single. cant believe in xmss she got some "most caring teacher award".

after the period ended, we found out that she actually sent our names to the dm. and then dm saw ccboon's (dm's favourite prefect!) name on the list then say "xiao shi." and ask charlie look for us. i was like -.-;

want to punish then do it all the way okay? dont make me stand outside the classroom for 15 mins then end it there. either end it with capital punishment or dont do it at all. ph00ls.

chem was boring.

well, this was my half day. now i'm at home slacking and my chinese file is in SCHOOL!! =D i mean, if my teacher cant be bothered then i dont think i should to. muarhar. i'll fail it tmr and make goh hock meng scared. see if he dare do this toward 30th may anot. DARE HIM ar. =P

xoxo;
4:42 pm

WHEE!!!

half day xP

xoxo;
6:25 am

life in 4-8 gets harder by the day.. it started with 4-1 and 4-10(actually more like frenly rivalry ba..) hating us at the start of last year.. then slowly this phenomenon spread to the other classes.. basically, slowly, but surely, the entire level came to detest us. now its happening within 4-8 itself lor.. i heard alvin also buay tahan the class le.. marvin also hving probs with some individuals here. so i dont feel so bad having problems with us. i'm not the only one. i think ccboon also starting to get pissed. i wont elaborate.

anyway.. tomorrow's half day!!! wahaha. WHEE!!!! *jumps around* ... ... ... *slams into wall* neway.. unexpected la. they said smt like only if CO get gwh then we get half day.. they get gold we also got it xD results are something like:
band - gold with honours
choir - gold with honours
CO - gold
ELDDS - gold
CLDDS - gold
modern dance - silver

lee hak boon was announcing it sorta like this "so, tomorrow we are gonna celebrate." at this point the p6 peeps started cheering. guess what happened next..

"for the secondary side only." (his face was like ^^;)
then the p6 suddenly went REALLY quiet.. and everyone else started cheering xD

"we are gonna have a half day!!! *deafening cheer* ...so tomorrow classes end at 10.40. *deafening cheer turns.. one level greater than deafening* "

piang! ch rox0rs xD and prelim on friday.. so tmr halfday is very appropriate lor.. can use to mug chi xD but i'll prolly be slacking at home. its only a prelim anyway.. who cares? =x

eh, nu er ah.. sry daddy never stay longer xD but i was liek, on 88 back to sch there and my mum really called lor o.o; i negelcted details so i sounded innocent.

"i'm on the bus now."

haha. next time ba.

xoxo;
5:16 pm

"shaun ho also very okay, but i want to see his parents because he hasn't been doing his homework." ng pe's lame excuse to make me one of the two most delinquent in maths whose parents she wants to see. i cant stand it. what hw haven't i passed up? i dont care that last term i got 26/72 for my hw marks, but this term i've been doing my hw. i only didn't hand in the e maths hol assignment and binomial excercise. but the rest? sets? possibility? transformation for A and E maths? everything, okay? i handed them ALL in. not my fault if you didn't get it. same goes for you, egoh. u nv get my brunei paper not my fault okay. my paper's not the only one u lost anyway. who else? at least another 6. you dont tell me this friday that i haven't been doing my work too okay.

then 4-8. okay. most of you are very nice. so ignore this is you happen to read this. its only to the other half to one quarter of the class.

4-8 ppl. dun think u very smart = very good okay. the truth is that this particular half the class is cruel as hell. not to mention childish. its funny when you do it once or twice, maybe even thrice. but not all the time. i dont wanna mention names. 4-8 sucks REAL BAD in comparison to 2703. i dont care what the topic is at the moment, but i really wonder if sometimes you can keep your traps shut. i cant stand u guys okay. especially those with... forget it. argh. whatever. if you ever see me staying away from you guys and not talking to you, you know why. so you losers better stop asking me why i'm so antisocial or anything. its not me. its YOU.

god. i miss 2703 all ofa sudden. no wait. i miss the gang too. why is it always.. three people..? geez. you guys had better come for haagen dazs opening. or your heads will roll.

on another note.. llp revealed today that the chem test he mark finish liao. someone got full marks.. nvm if i didn't get it. at least beat the top scorer in 4-10 can le.
test results -
differentiation and integration (8/4/05) : 9/35. i'm thrilled.
possibility(dateless): 18/20.

ohmigod. tomorrow pe we're playing a game similar to..

TENNIS!!!

wahaha. at least theres something i can look forward to in school tomorrow... -.-;

dilemma again. how to say.. its a bit like zuo you wei nan, but then again its not.. maybe its more like, you dunno what will happen if you go one way or another. but in this case the road doesn't stop. it just keeps going, so a decision must be made. there were witnesses, and i guess it was typical that such an event happened in such a situation. the source may or may not be reliable.. but it may be a litte exaggerated.. i really dunno. the world is so weird nowadays that pigs fly. but then.. i dunno what will the recipient do in either case.. what will happen..?

twitchy eyelids are bad omens right? if one twitch is already bad.. what about.. lessay.. frequent twitching at random intervals since the start of the day? right from i woke up. the lastest twitch was a few minutes ago. wonder what's gonna happen.

life is.. hard.

i'll be here..
why..?
i'll be 'waiting'.. here...
for what?
i'll be waiting.. for you. so..
if you come here,
you'll find me.
i promise.

FF8.

xoxo;
3:26 pm

4.05pm update - added alvin lim's blog to my links! HEY ALVIN@!!! welcome to the family of us bloggers =D
_______________________


had a reeeeaaaaally exciting nite yesterday. notice the italics? haha. i'll explain.

7.30pm. first signs of a war going on. i was like having dinner and they were fighting. it wasn't obvious, but i had to say it out loud after a while. they were getting on my nerves. BIG TIME. everytime such stuff happens, i usually dont care, but this time i bothered to say something. the war grew too large too fast.

"I HAVE A HEADACHE!!!!!"

then my mum suggested panadol. i was like, oh yeah. ^^; then i took one, went to my room. by 7.45 my head was exploding, and i decided to sleep. i was doing my dwit halfway, btw, so i told my brother "wake me up at 9.30 to complete my work. kplzthx" so i slept.

8.30. WT*!!!! i cant stand it. been trying to sleep for half an hour but my head's still splittin. i felt warm, but i decided to take the comforter from the opposite room. btw, the aircon was on. strangely enough, when i had the comforter over me, i felt even warmer, but i felt more.. well o.o; then i fell dead asleep.

9.45. 'kor. u wan me to wake u up rite." "i dun wanna do le. thanks." efficient rite, he. my brother rox xD but dont tell him i said that. he'll get big headed >.>

12.00. wokeded up again. by myself! =D then went to finish my dwit. was 12.25 by then. then tried to sleep again. die la. sleep for 4 hours liao, wake up already, cannot sleep le. i was like.. dortz!!! and there was still a teeeeeeeny little headache there. i think the peace treaty was gonna come.

1.45. i.. cant.. sleep... O.O; anw i think i musta slept and wokeded up millions of times during this 1 hr period. it passed really quickly but i felt as if i didn't sleep. then i moved over to the sofa bed. yep, the sofa bed. guess what. i died. straight away. wow. when i woke up this morn i was like, O.o;;

oh, btw, panadol DOESN'T WORK. it is ineffective as.. cocacola at keeping you awake. yep. best treatment for headache - sleep for at least 3 hrs. but i read somewhere that sex was the best painkiller.. o.o;

today - THREE TESTS!! OMG. i thot only got chem test. come to sch then i was like, omg. got geog too. then krishnan came in and popped us a compre test. that was HARD as hell. "Q1. what does "reveille" refer to?" walao. i read and reread and reread the passage a few times lor. then i guess. -.-; btw, i'm not a camping person, so i think you peeps in ncc or npcc or what uniform grp should have no prob answering this.

chem test. wahaha. u ar, 4-10 de ppl ar, ur top score only 39/40. I CHALLENGE! roflmao. thx to all those that help me revise during recess.. yida, zhitao, yonghua, kok mun kiat (who i dont really know and isn't in my class either), zhiwen, derrick, yen shan, dennis, alvin.. etc. if i missed ur name tell me. i'll add it here. but seriously. i thought it was really easy.. perf score not impossible for this. but if i make careless mistakes.. ah. whatever xD and geog test.. sucked. dont ask xD

i think i'm officially cured of depression. no one said i had attitude problems today, i was grinning the whole day and zhitao mentioned that i had.. strange desires. so it means i'm okay now xD either that or mentally-gone-wrong. as in.. crazy. =D

oh, btw, to whom it concerns, if you read this, just know this. it is true that you can hide thoughts. however, every thought is tagged with an emotion. this emotion will show itself, no matter how subtly, on a person's face and is almost impossible to hide unless you're.. squall from ff8. so, stop lying and tell the truth for once. its fun not sinning, you know?

you dont know how hard it is...
really.

xoxo;
3:06 pm

so much to say, but i cant say. xP

anw, today's not very interesting. except prolly my phone bill. meh. nothing much. really. i have nuuuuuthing to say today.

what are friends for?
...
wipe your tears and grab my hand.
i'll lead you out of this turmoil.

xoxo;
4:10 pm

we were supposed to have a group outing. yeah. you know who you are. i'm sooo gonna whack you two tomorrow.

neway waked up and went out very soon. guess where. to the mrt station. DUH! anw. then i took mrt to jurong east, then to boon lay, then back to jurong east, then to choa chu kang, then i took the LRT!! but it was boring. VERY boring. not as fun as i thought.. its like the sky train only not so fun la. and the whole train ride took half an hour. -.-; didn't expect it to be so long lor.. i wanted to go explore lot1 shopper's mall.. budden stupid thing take so long -.-;

anw, then went to somerset, then back to braddell. it was.. 11.40 then. then went to city hall, then to marina square. went to drum. hey xuhau, i passed timepiece phase II again kay? still dare to curse me? hmph. xP anw, was there la. but only played two games then zaoded ler. went to marina bay, then mrt'd back to bishan. went to dome, and.. err.. had a double scoop ice cream. but actually only took abt half of it. xD studied binomial theorem.. walao. this teacher ar.. damn good. explain 1 minute i understand le xD so i went to do.. then actually could answer those binomial expansion qns la. okay. LAO SHI!! XIE XIE!!

then went back to j8 later by request. it was too crowded earlier.. but went back and found a place at mac to hog. had another ice cream. oh, btw, u know rite.. the mac ice cream cone qi jia le. its now 50 cents again.. not 25 le =( and there.. i found out i had another daughter. dunno what my "wife" was doing lor.. this girl suddenly come up to me and say PAPA!!! and i was (o.o); again. but shes still my daughter rite, so muz take care lor.. *sigh* study a while..

then went to bishan park. go there play swing xD my two daughters play until stomach pain. then after that the older one went back, and we left the place. got a soyabean with pearls and took bus back. yep, that shoulda be all.

anw.. you two hor. you daaaaaare pang seh me again ar. i make sure ur head roll on the floor okay. i will personally see to that. but your limbs are prolly already bleeding like fountains, so i guess it'll stop you from doing that ever again >=) the next time we go out will be when haagen dazs at j8 opens. i'm gonna make sure u two go.. else.. yeah. u get my point.

i've got sand in my shoes..
o.o;

xoxo;
6:16 pm

sun's been rising early lately..

crazi, crazi. why wont you just tell me who you are hmm? you've posted.. at least 2 times, and during sch hours too. but frm what i know.. u're frm sg, and play FFX. cannot be frm my class too. you think i should be convinced that suicide is for losers. yeah. AB rox. anw... WHO ART THOU!? my brain's going crazy from all this thinking.

oh, btw, i slapped chew choon boon in class ytd. FUNNNN.

me = officially crazy. ask some of my friends. i still swing, but when i'm up its reeeaaaaaally up. yeah.

looking forward to tmr. gotta play timepiece phase II again.. totally rox0rs. get ter go on another grp outing again!! =D i tell u ar.. if tmr i'm too crazy to stand, kick me onto the mrt line. xP or at least just ignore me. i'm a nonenitiy escapist. anyone need a dictionary? xP i'm gonna drum like no other tomorrow. coz its the last weekend i'm gonna enjoy without tuition.

yeap. i'm gettin tuition for english as well. the teacher's supposedly fun, but someone once said history was interesting, so.. yeah. you get my point. but she said that given my current standard, distinction chance is abt 50%. so acc to her i'm quite good.. haha. but she still wants me to change to expository essays.. she sae its more.. outstanding. easier to get a1. i was like (o.o);

okay. lets end it here. btw, just to tell you, check the source consistently. sometimes i'll add stuff hidden in there. nothing today tho.

xoxo;
5:32 pm

ehh.. ytd's suicide note.. *ahem* blog entry =D seriously.. doesn't mean anyth. i'm serious! i'm just replaying a discussion i had with a fren. i'm christian.. i shld know better than most that suicide is the beginning of problems, not the end.

neway.. sch life = boring. lately i look forward desperately to saturdays when i can go out.. but then again, i dread coming home also. what does that mean? i wanna go out. but hey, i'm broke. no $$ = no outings >< and that also means? i cant get what i want. <.< o well. i guess i'll wait xD next week sat = rest day. every sat for the past.. 7 weeks i've been going out. that means.. o levels & prelim = die. which also = rjc = very far away even tho its just a short bus ride away. not to mention that i just failed a phy test!! =DDDDDD

btw, someone noticed that i showed signs of depression frm the start of the year. it was my mum's colleague.. she read my 3 essays written for exams, and noticed smt. in all three, without fail, someone dies. hmm.. food for thought yeah? apparently its just been building up and now its released in full. it starts with sadness, then depression, then funny thoughts then insanity. i'm at insanity now. yeah. T.T

read my friendster testimonials. abt half say i have bad mood swings, and that i've changed a lot recently. i wanna change back. if i could turn back time.. i'd not have done many things. *sigh*

ps. yesterday's entry is not a suicide note. just a discussion. kplzthx.

xoxo;
5:02 pm

7.08pm update - DISCLAIMER: this is not a suicide note. its just a log of a discussion, that's all. take it with a pinch of salt.
_______________________________________

nothing much interesting today.. except one.

i told someone..

"if i were to commit suicide, i would write letters. one to my each of my parents, one to each of my brothers, one to 4-8, one to 2-7, one to a lot of other people.. then i would come early to school one day. leave them on my table, and write next to it 'i'll be dead by now. distribute my letters for me. thanks for the last time.' then i'll go outside. walk around until daybreak. when the sun rises, i climb to the top of a hdb block. then i say my final goodbyes and release myself. thoughts would flow. i would think of everything. i can reflect on my wasted life. it'll be great. until i land."

xoxo;
3:05 pm

its gone. its officially gone. my sanity.. and my social section.

today in class.. geez. remember i told u abt that physics test? that one abt the light and waves? well, i really failed it. gan kai wan duan. dunno whether to laugh or cry.

then today in bio jeffrey went "from what i know, you can peel a banana's skin." no one laughed. i was giggling really loudly for the next ten minutes. choon boon was staring. yeah.

and for the rest of you, u mite think i'm really quiet. its coz i'm tired. tired from everything that's happened. now i'm withdrawing away from reality and all of you. i need a driving force to pull myself back. i failed physics and i went up to xuhau and said "YES! I FAILED PHYSICS!!!!" then we hi-5'ed. that's the state i'm in now.

so yeah. if i dont talk much all ofa sudden, u know what's happening. i'm fighting fantasy, reality, insanity and depression. i'm melting snow but making it come back at the same time. if any of you have ever felt like, at night you wanna cry but you cant, the tears are just behind your eyes and are about to flood out, but are not coming, you know how i feel. but someone u lucky ppl out there have people to talk to. i dunno who i should talk to.. who's the right person... who will keep my casefile private and not say. i acknowledge the fact that people are trying to help.. thanks, but sorry.

xoxo;
4:34 pm

HEYA! i'm feeling high as hell today, so you guys had better enjoy it while it lasts xP

ytd i got maksim mrvica's album!!!! OMG. some songs are kewl, but a particular 12 min one hurted like anything. i mean, 12 minutes of a song that sounds like some greek fanfare. haha.. it hurtSSS!!!!!! anw, kolibre and merry christmas mr. lawrence rawk. esp. kolibre. i heard it once and i was.. stuck to it xD and totentanz sounds evil. in some instances it'd be totally kewl. but sometimes not. its still kewl anyway. plus, the album's cheap. 18.90.. k la. not the cheapest album ever, but you've seen more expensive albums rite? FFXI soundtrack was going at $47. okay, i think i've substantiated enuff xD

today took napfa. was pissed at first. goh kee yong plus bad weather = I HATE YOU. so firstly, it rained. know what that means? we cant run our shuttle run at the track. then we were initially given a slippery concrete floor. first try - run 10 m, slip. second try - run 10m, slip, run 10m, slip, run 10m, slip, run 10m, fail by 0.1s. screwed. whole class failed it at first. so we went to goh kee yong and asked him if can retake during PE period anot. then he was like "MY FAULT IZZIT?! you were given a choice last week to take your napfa during PE. not my fault if now u cant run." other PE teachers noticed smth wrong lor, so they changed the venue to the pri sch hall after some negotiation later. so after some other stations, we went back, then i ran, and got way past an A xD but i didn't beat j lau.. what he do? he waddle here, waddle back, strut here, sashay back. timing - 9.3s. sianz@@~~!! anyway, i missed a gold by 1 chinup. i wont post detailed results here so ppl wont say i show off xP but if you want.. tag and i'll update it.. wahaha.

oh, btw, if you managed to get access to my tagboard ytd night, you would have noticed a message going "i hid something in the source" i think you shld go find it. it shall help you in some... things. oh yeah. i think i needta explain things. the board's been down coz they were doing some maintenance on it.. so i guess it was down the whole day ytd. now it should be back up, only a bit slower la. yep, should suffice.

oh.. and many ppl are noticing my mood swings now.. i think its getting outta hand. i need someone to help control me. some evidence:
zhitao, "lately shaun very violent ar... ...mood can swing from here, to here *makes finger movements* in such a short while"
my mum (-.-;), "since lately you wanna do something else on saturdays, like, not even thinking about your schoolwork on saturdays, means you're stressed. stop saying you aren't. *then she laughs*"

well, yeah. everyone's been commenting. today alvin couldn't stop grinning at me. dunno what it meant. i go over and ask him then he say "nothing! really! nothing!" and i noticed i was gonna whack him. violent, huh. i used to be very peaceful.. i guess times are changing. but i need to melt the snow. i cant stay in this "winter wonderland on a raven canvas" forever. but.. i just cant.. not do it. i mean, if it comes it comes.. geez. i found myself sprawled over the backrest of my seat again after chem lesson. die. i think i'm losing hope in life. I CANT!!!

god. that 12 minute song is playing now. SAVE ME!!!!

xoxo;
6:15 pm

this morning i woke up. first thing i felt: tears behind my eyes. they were there. but they just weren't about to come out. STOP TORTURING ME!!!

my life is now like a frozen abyss. snow falls all the time, the ground is white but the road ahead is black. people often say that people like me, with my kind of academic results have a very bright future. i seriously doubt it.

this monochromatic abyss grows day by day. it slowly gets the attention of the people nearby, and now even people from afar see it. many have tried to pierce through this torturous sanctuary but to no avail. they want to help whoever's trapped inside, but this person is too far in to be reached. the snow's been spreading far. i just hope it doesn't affect others.

from my position at the top of the frosted summits i see green pastures. far away, but green nonetheless. life goes on happily there, and there are supposedly no ails to whatever grows there. i once lived there. but one day, snow started to fall around me. it followed wherever i went and i just gave up running away from it. i wanted to fight it, but it just.. continued.

now i've given up, the glacial spikes growing around my feet. this place is inpenetrable, unreachable by the likes of others. just give it up.

xoxo;
1:09 pm

"yay. i passed. haha. i rock."

anyone interested enough can enquire.

my counselor told me to think happy thoughts.




i couldn't keep that for long. after a while it became..




i have an animated gif accurately describing this effect. anyone interested enough can enquire again. tag or msn, whichever.

i think i'm screwed.

xoxo;
6:03 pm

xoxo;
8:50 pm

today's been weird. people been commenting on my moods, and they say its really funny. chew choon boon says i behave depressed.. xuhau said i was uber hyper in class, then suddenly in recess very mellow. weird huh. thus, i can conclude.. i'm suffering from extreeeeem mood swings. people count mood swings in days, some even seasons. i think you can count mine in half hours... or even minutes. xD

so anyway.. sch today's well, aaaaalright.....

okay. i'll stop deluding myself. it was boring. during danny's lesson i was doing a test ppl took last week.. cant believe it. the first ss test ever that i dunnow what the qns asking for.. like dunno if its inference or reliability or anyth.. it was like "why did margaret thatcher make this speech?" *mouth wide open* no confidence at all. think i'll fail T.T

hmm.. tmr physics test.. it includes light and waves. you know something? i think i'm screwed. i dunno nuts abt light, less abt waves. especially lenses. critical angle? i only know n = 1/sin c. which means....? gawd. haha. k larh. first physics test i'll ever fail. i've set goals for prelim le. phys, chem, a maths, e maths, geog A1. english hopefully B3, then they moderate and its an A1. xD so i'll have my 6 to go to rj. wheee! i think my a1 in phys and chem is pretty much almost there.. and prolly e maths too. but i gotta werk for geog and a maths. especially geog. OMG. i HAAAATE human geog. it screws. ReAL bAD. never passed a single human geog test, prolly never will. xD i just dunno how to answer those stupid case study qns. geez. I HatE HUmAN gEOg. hATE iT rEAL BAd. yeah. i hate sooooo little.. i mean much.

these few days i'm really on a roll xD its been raining like the sky's crying for the people of the world, lightning as if the clouds knew we had energy crises and thunder like rock bands have never seen. i love it. i need more thunderstorms. i gain comfort from them. dunno why. i'm strange. anyone comment on this and i'll slay you. one by one. neck by neck.

omg. that's what i meant. read my first paragraph. anyone notice the diff between the second paragraph and the previous one? i think something's wrong with me >< i dunno.. dun feel stressed or anyth.. sch's doing well, in cca i'm really relaxed and i listen.. even do more in class. which reminds me. i'm tired as hell. dunno why also. lately even tho i sleep early i'm tired as though someone drained my energy with a stab in the chest. or a bullet in the leg. i was stoning in my mum's car. i went breathless after 10 mins of tennis. during liak phong's lesson i was doing my chem worksheet past the requirement and i felt like dying. but i still continued. farnie. hmm.

someone save me. i need a psychologist. but i dont wana pay the costs xP haha.. someone counsel me for me xD roflmao. for free. i dun mind unprofessionalism. just talk to me, then listen. i'll talk then walk out without you saying anyth. roflmao.

i'm mad.

xoxo;
4:03 pm

events that happened on this day in history..


1919 - The Amritsar Massacre
1941 - Japan and USSR sign nonaggression pact
1970 - Apollo 13 oxygen tank explodes
2005 - Shaun Ho felt that for the first time, SCH RAWKED.

haha.. k larh. actually it didn't rawk as in got any event or all, but today seemed a much more light-hearted day. full of quotes also =D

first thing in the morning, pe. goh kee yong came with a pair of.. omg. HOT PINK socks. we were like.. what the hell is that. then he said "no.. these are not pink socks. they are proper length socks, only that they are pink and with stwawbellies" omg.. damn funny xD and the way he said stwawbellie was like.. roflmao.. but the socks really look gay. i think he was looking for ppl with low socks to give it to.. i'd better watch out.

then english class.. we were doing english description, then adeline krishnan said "whoever saw a clown in black?" dennis went "indian".. roflmao.. then adeline was all "i'm very open and all.." then she continued "but what's important is inside. your character, personality, virtues." "you choose. u want a black heart, or a clean heart?" i was liek, OMG! i agree wif u totally.

many ppl today commented that i was exceptionally happy today. then they were like, did anyth happen to you yesterday? someone even checked my forehead for fever. but one individual said something different. xuhau went "why u so sad today?" i guess best friends will always be best friends ^^;

eh. nvm that xD jeffrey was doing the chapter on reproduction. 3rd lesson i think, and all three lessons he was like, using the word burst. quote alvin, "dunno why he like the word burst so much" i was like.. oh yeah. haha.. nth to say. neway, geog lesson was as usual la. boring. elaine thinks her class is soooo much fun and all.. i tink if she asks any of us for her opinion she'll be disappointed as hell la.. honestly her first few lessons on rivers and coastal landforms not that bad.. then as she progressed it got more and more boring. the even the increase increased. we're talking abt positive + increasing gradient here.. most teachers get boring up to a limit and stop there.. hers not stopping but accelerating lor.

oh yeah. yesterday nite it POURED LIKE HELL! omg. i looooved it. plus the fact that lightning practically never ceased.. it ruled. r0x0red. stuff. it was real kewl ytd nite. i even went as crazy as not to close my room window when it was at the peak of the shower. i was.. revelling in the wetness. oh gawd. ruled. r0x0red. stuff. felt at the top of the world. dunno why but when its really rainy and all i love it =D rain again tonite!!! i want it.

i looove rain. and stars. and sunset at the beach. and any open space at nite. and lightning. and auroras. and... man. haha.. the list never ends tho. xP

i told someone in class today "in this world there is nothing worth feeling happy or sad about." what do you guys think? Write an essay containing between 350 to 600 words on the above topic. You are advised to plan out your essay before writing it, and spend no more than 55 minutes on this section. Begin your answer on a fresh page.

haha.. j/k. tag me with opinions! coz if not i'm gonna live that way. xP

xoxo;
3:21 pm

UPDATE - added a hell lotta quizzes.

at first i didn't wanna blog, then i decided.. what the heck

guess what happened in the morning. first thing in the morning, lee hak boon comes in to talk to us. he was liek, "what's your name? what's your cca?" and that's all. apparently we're the only class so far he's done this to. dunno what he wants.. dunno if we did smth great or smth baaad. neway that's all he did.. then he zaoded o.o; so all u other sec 4s, careful hor. lhb mite just drop by one morning.. and dont sleep in the morning also. yun le almost died.. hak boon didn't look happy when he saw yun le sleeping la, but he kept his cool. i also just realised how bad.. or how good he thinks, his memory is. when he asked my name, and i answered, first thing he said "eh? i didn't see you at the motivational workshop" -.-;

oh gawd, i'm damn tired.

then we had chem prac test. omg.. cant believe a mistake a made. u know rite, when they ask u warm gently, u really supposed to warm gently rite. guess what i did. i _boiled_ it. as if that's not all, u know how much force a liquid has especially when its boiling.. so yeah. plus the fact that the gas cannot escape coz of the tiny diameter of the test tube, it sorta spills over. just at that point, i had a right hand over the mouth of the test tube with a damp red litmus on it. omfg. that was really stupid xD so i got scalded la. but strangely.. it didn't stay hot for a long time. either it was soooo impure that the boiling point was soooo low, or i went numb =D

also i found a kewl thing to do. first, get a solution of sodium sulphate or thiosulphate.. i'm not sure which. then add hydrochloric acid to it, and leave it for a while. when u see a opaque suspension of yellow-white precipitate, add dilute aqueous ammonia to it. wanna know what happens? u get FUMES of ammonia gas.. roflmao. i stank the place up =P and it was kewl as hell.. wahaha. red litmus turned blue almost immediately.

i also realised how crazy sulphur dioxide is. even when the blue litmus wasn't damp, it turned it red. yeah. crazy acidic. so all you global warming watchers out there, know how acidic sulphur dioxide is.

oh, btw, go read the previous entry again. the code's still the same, but now, if you guess the contents correct, you.. GET A PRIZE! roflmao. but it was double coded, forward and backward. just so you know, the E --> AB and AB --> E at the bottom is for my reference so i know how to uncode it next time. you mite.. wanna use it xD

oh, btw, the jap words on the strip of paper says "i think i'm crazy." haha.. so much for expecting something kewl xP


"I am here, but sometimes, I'm really not. Nothing really matters here, so I don't see why I should consider myself a part of this world and it's pathetic ways. I am nothingness, and that is why I am here. To be nonexistant."

something's eclipsing my stars...

________________________________________


HASH(0x85c8898)


What type of Depression do you have? (MANY different outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla


~*BLACK*~ Gothic, dark and Multi-talented. You are
always hidden beneath the shadows and like to
surprise your 'prey'. Never let anyone tell you
otherwise, you ARE very unique! Go rebel!


What Color of Mood are you?(ANIME PICS!!!)
brought to you by Quizilla

You r usally very sad, u hate the world, for
hateing u.


What kind of mood are u?
brought to you by Quizilla


You have an intense kiss! You and your partner
connect when you kiss and you forget about the
rest of the world. Hey, call me!!! ^_~


What anime kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


Gold! You have golden eyes. You tend to be quite
distant, and may come off as depressed. In
truth, you are, but once people get to know
you, a smile or a laugh breaks through your
emotion barrier every now and then!


What Color Are Your Anime Eyes?
brought to you by Quizilla


You are a spring. You are very mellow most of the
time except for the caffine season (which is
year round) but you are also a very nice
person. When people tick you off though God
better save them. lol You are a fairly
socialable person because people know you won't
get mad too easy or seem to. But you are a very
nice peron over all. ^-^


What Season Best Fits You? (anime pics)
brought to you by Quizilla


You belong in the land of darkness, otherwise known
as one of the worlds in which I dwell. All here
is beauty inspired by tragedy and great sorrow.
Write or go through other creative outlets to
express the anguish you may be feeling, and
never let anyone tell you that you are just
being 'weepy' or full of 'teenage angst'(if
you're a teenager.If not, then they really
should be punished for calling you one. They
probably are trying to insult your
maturity...fools.)and always remain yourself,
dark and amazing. Never change.


Where do you belong?(ANIME IMAGES)
brought to you by Quizilla


Your eyes should be gray.. the same color you see
the world. You have faced many sorrows and
losses, but yet its starting to get to you.
You're depressed and lonely, so maybe it might
be time to go and find someone to talk to.


What Color Eyes Should You Have? ( With Anime Pictures ^-^ )
brought to you by Quizilla



Sais! The smalles and lethalest pitchforks on
earth. Invented by farmers, the Sais are more a
defensive weapon to protect yourself against
swords.


What's your Weapon? .._..contains Anime pictures.._..
brought to you by Quizilla


~VIOLET OR PURPLE~
Your very mysterous and rare. You're usally laid
back and very quit. You're shy,cool,com and
lazy. You always seem like your hidding a big
secert. You keep to yourself alot, even with
friends.Rate^-^


What's your anime hair color? COOL PICS^-^UPDATED!!!
brought to you by Quizilla


Sad...


Who exactly ARE you? (AnImE PiCs)
brought to you by Quizilla


Your word is: Brooding. You are a true thinker and
often try to figure out the meaning of life,
why we are all here etc. You may not be so
social, and often think twice before acting but
those thoughts you have in your mind never stop
flowing in. Sometimes you can be so
concentrated you forget about other things that
you have to do. Don't change, this world needs
deep people.


What dark word represents you? (anime pics and 7 outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla


Your word is: Sad. You wanted to give yourself to
someone. But they didn't accept you. Being
rejected, whether it be from family, friends,
love-interests or peers, is a very hurtful
thing to go through. It is also likely that you
have been betrayed several times before, which
is why you keep away from everyone now. You
learned the hard way to never trust people and
your defence-mechanism is now to isolate
yourself. Yet you yearn for people who will
understand and like you, to have the thing you
never had: love.


What dark word represents you? (anime pics and 7 outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla


Black/grey Youre heart is empty and your mind is
filled with basically nothing but morbid
thoughts of death and nothingness. Youre a
loner, and thats ok for you because you dont
like people and have little social skills to
none. Like Purple youre very deep and
thoughtful and often spend your time at your
computer or alone in your dark room,
reading/writing anything that is around. Youre
alone and maybe you want that to change but
than again maybe you dont


What color is your mind? (Anime Pictures)
brought to you by Quizilla


You're a loner. There's nothing wrong with being a
loner, it just means that you like your own
company better than someone else's. However,
you do enjoy animals and you are really a very
nice person.


What Kind Of Anime Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


You symbolize sadness. You are always either
frowning or crying for the rest of the worlds
unshed tears. You cry when a soul departs for
the other world. Seeing the rain gives you
comfort. It reminds you of the tears that you
shed. When people try to put you down, it makes
you even more depressed than you already are.


Which Emotion do you represent?(AWESOME anime pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

xoxo;
4:02 pm

UPDATE - 8.09pm : okay. you guys are feeling preeeetty pissed that you get nothing today. soo.. i'll get ya something.

I’ve been sleeping a thousand years it seems
got to open my eyes to everything
without a thought without a voice without a soul
don't let me die here
there must be something more

Sometimes love works in
Mysterious ways
One day you wake up
Gone without a trace

Late at night I'm still wide awake
Feelin this is one more than I can take

O2Jam NX - BeautifulDay - Cold Scream.
__________________________________

okay. you guys wont like this. its in code. okay? so stop trying.

tidou a vyrt iet vatn camnyssy ogoar. at vol oss pyomnu ord ltejj ot jahlt. ltejj vyrt vyss, ri iry lov el.. vy voskyd ar tny mihhymt dahymtair, vy vyrt ti cil behgyh jih sermn. at vol hyossu jary. ojtyh tnot tnargl git vihly. micy ti tnark obiet at, a cody o miepsy tyhhabsy yhhihl o vnasy bomk. hycycbyh cu syttyh? a vhity a tnark a saky uie ar wop. a hyossu nipy lny dirt corogy ti dymapnyh at.. mif a kriv lny sakyl llk cemn cihy. aj lny lyyl cu syttyh.. a caty coky nyh coky o vhirg dymalair. in gid.. a ryyd nysp. ikou. tnyr ir jhadou vyrt tyrralarg vatn nyh tii. pyipsy omteossu lov. TNAOR VOR YRG LOV. tnyr a nyohd ltihayl. gyyf. dohr. j. gid. tidou'l byyr rit lemn o ghyot dou. ikou. nyhy giyl. ojtyh tny byottu arzyltatehy, llk ord wolir vyrt ti coml. vy vyrt tnyhy tii.. tnyr ltejj noppyryd. 5 caretyl nodr't pollyd. a git cod ot nac, ord lticpyd iet. tnyr wolir mocy iet ord tisd cy ti gyt bomk ar. geyll vnot a lov. camn vol oss qeayt ord oss.. saky dyphyllyd. tnyr, ol vy vyhy voskarg bomk ti tny belltip, geyll vnot. llk vyrt oss yq-syll ogoar ord vyrt ir o toskarg lphyy. toskarg obt vnot uie lniesd kriv. camn git YZYR cihy qeayt so. a kryv licytnarg vol vhirg bu tnyr. govd.

a kriv a dad vhirg tidou, ord coru tacyl bomk. a vol vhirg. a lniesdr't.. gon. jihgyt at. a'ss gi nady culysj ar o mihryh ogoar. a'ss psou dyjyrlazy lnitl. ri cihy ryt nattarg. mif a silt tny hossu tidou. a mocy, a lov tny hytehr, a callyd.

a hyossu nipy tnal al tny solt tacy a vhaty ar midy. a dirt vorro di tnal ogoar. at nehtl. cyrtossu.
E --> AB, 2.

o'ss bu eayn gaad znouhd. o joss bu rippe zan eay jruh eay'nu yp, ihd zuus bid zan eay'nu dajh. ha canu. o khaj eay'wu cidu tru mannumt dumoloah.
AB --> E, 2.

i wont answer any queries on this post. do your work!
............................................................................

xoxo;
5:30 pm

i'm lame. i loooove analogies, so here's another one. xP

life is a looong tennis match. the thing is that everyone plays the same opponent. this opponent, is everything outside yourself. we call it reality. every point is a moment in life, every game a milestone, every set a chapter. the length of this match is the strength of your mind. if you fight hard, the game gets longer. if you give in, it gets shorter. also, in the end, its not the result that counts. its how you played.

yesterday i was given a dropshot. i coulda just killed it, albeit the risk. but i think.. this is not the time. i just returned the ball, and watched for the next move. i was thinking, if i'd killed it yesterday, what would happen? would the other side be able to get the ball and return it? or would the ball fly, and the party not be able to get it? i.. dunno. coz if the ball were returned i wouldn't be able to take it. i would have been recovering from the hard whack and the ball would whizz past me. basically, i woulda lost. instead, i gave it a nice return, and recovered back into position. i'm now ready for the kill. it will come. very soon. its just a matter of the setup, whether the next ball that returns would be alright for a kill. or whether the other side would kill my nice return ball. but given a chance, i would kill it this time. i just know it. now i'm waiting for the return.

yesterday was probably the first sign that i was on the offensive. the other times, i had just returned the ball defensively and kept it in. this would mean that the overly consistent opponent would inevitably continue the rally. either that, or kill it and end the point. shots that are too defensive become bait for a hard hit, often ending the game. dont forget that reality is a veeery consistent and seasoned player. it keeps all its shots in no matter how hard it is. the only way to win is to outplay it, and not outhit it. i've been playing too defensive and setting up too many shots for reality to kill. that's why i'm where i am today. but i've learnt, from theory and practice, that a clear way to win, is to set up a wide and deep shot, get to the net and prepare for the kill. the shots dont have to be hard. they just have to reflect the strategy you're using, or at least a bit of thinking, like putting it out of the way. yesterday's shot was a drop. if i got reckless and hit too hard, it would have gone out of hand and i woulda lost.. that was the risk. so, instead, i returned it. if the next ball comes in nicely, i would just place it out of reach, win this point, start a new, better one. if it comes hard, i'd just put it back in play and continue. its hard to pass a volleyer in singles. but now that i'm at the net, i'm at the advantage. i'll keep it this way.

i dont think many of you would understand, but this is for my ears. if you happen to be able to understand, go you! the thing is, you dont know the score now. the first set hasn't even ended for me yet. but i'm sure many games were won and lost.


hiding meanings in words. its the epitome of a public diary. its something you want others to know, but you dont want others to know. this is life.

do you feel the same way as me?

xoxo;
3:26 pm

UPDATE - i forgot. today's my blog's first month anniversary!! YYAAAAAYYYY!!!! a whole 31 posts xD its time to celebrate. GIMME PRESENTS!!
j/k =P

_________________________________

today's been a weird day.

started out with me waking up at 6.50. then i couldn't be bothered to wake up. so i slept again. 7.25. then 7.57, just before i set my alarm to ring xD so i turned my alarm off.. guess what.. fell asleep again. then i woke at 8.15, and then again at 8.30. talk about wanting to sleep but cant.

then i went out with xuhau. i was like, all over the place today. i went to ps twice in two hours too xD so it was..
house-->ps
ps-->bishan
bishan-->yck
yck-->ps
ps-->house

haha.. imagine that. $2.25 on public transport today. but public transport means, yes. 45 minutes alone. but today i couldn't think of something to think of. so i let my mind wander.

honestly, it didn't. it stayed somewhere else.

oh yeah. remember i once had a problem with my internet connection? well. its reeeeally weird, but all the comps in the house are getting the problem one by one. including the laptops. so its really prolly a virus. my dad's out today getting 4 copies of mcafee virusscan.. roflmao.

gee. i just realised how limited the selection of bands is at 77th street.

when i was at the busstop waiting for 162 to dhoby ghaut, i saw someone familiar. then i thought for a while. OMG. that cant be. it's my tuition teacher's daughter. guess what was the first thing i thought when i saw her.. "gee. she's sure put on weight" xD not much, but last time she was reeeeaaally skinny. now shes more.. not so skinny. roflmao. did i mention she got what.. 260+ for her psle? stupid geniuses...

i saw this somewhere.. "ooooh kissing. I like kissing. It's so romantic. Under a starry sky and a full moon. With a gentle breeze blowing through our hair. ::sighs::" i was like.. O.O;

it was a really fun day. but a tad incomplete tho. it missed.. oh yeah. bowling. the stupid alley was full. the lady at the counter said we're "full until 2AM." i was like.. huh? 2 PM or AM? and then she said. AM. i was like okaaaay. xD and it's.. not done.

i feel..

You're the Bongun!

from ragnarok online official site:
LV : 32 Type : Undead Attribute : Undead
Male frozen corpse that had became a monster by his
own will to protect the girl, Munak. He has a
tender passion to Munak , he does anything for
her.

Aww, isn't that just too sweet?^_^


Which Ragnarok Online monster are you?
brought to you by Quizilla



Fairy tales, your love will be like an imaginary
story, you love to love, you believe you have
only one soul mate is waiting for you some
where in this world and you are sure you will
find them one day, and when you do you will
make them the happiest in the whole world.


Where will you find love?
brought to you by Quizilla



You hate not to love but you hate to fall in love.
You can't help but sigh when you see to people
kiss in the park and all. You don't like to go
over board and believe in a small steady
relationship at first so that it can grow. You
also like to think that you can have that kiss
that puts you into a portal and you can't get
back until he/she stops.


How much do you love? GOOD PICS
brought to you by Quizilla


You are innocent love. You long for someone to
spend your days with, most of all a best
friend. You do not want to rush things, and you
like marks of affection that are
"cute".


What kind of love are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


Angel


Seriously...How evil are you REALLY?
brought to you by Quizilla



You are brightly shining with Red Love.

Wow, you really love your partner. You red Love Ray
is the most prominent right now. Either you're
devoted, or you're just obsessive. But does it
really matter which?


What color of love are you most glowing with?
brought to you by Quizilla


You're a good person. You're always a good
person to everyone and everyone likes you...
except for the evil people.



*How evil are you?*
brought to you by Quizilla



You are totally in love.You try to hide it but you
cant.You are nice and pretty in your own way
and you are a bit of a daydreamer.Have fun!


Are you in love?
brought to you by Quizilla


Sugary Evil: You're the evil flavor of the day, the
popular type of evil that gets upset when it
sees true evil and gets all offended. You're
the "tee-hee, I'm teh evilest" type
whose most evil act is to whine about your
parents/friends/coworkers. That's okay, though.
You're young yet, you have time to grow and
expand your evil into a dark rose.


What Type of Evil are You?
brought to you by Quizilla



What Kind of Kiss Are You? (for guys & girls)
brought to you by Quizilla


Meow! You are so evil but SOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Kawaii!!!______________

your kind of lover is: well your not really onto
love in B/f style... yet_____________

who lovers you: ummm whatch out for the Sadistik
dude!____________________


Your anime Evil is....?
brought to you by Quizilla

xoxo;
5:02 pm

i think i've said this once, but i'll say it again.

life is like a story. your story. every person writes his own. the trouble is that every person writes in his or her own language, and only that person would understand it fully. family members have similar dialects so they understand each other better. strangers have really different languages, so it would take a while to read their story. certain parts even need the person to explain to you. also remember that while you write, people are writing too. so essentially, as time passes for you, so does it for others.

let me tell you about this page in my book.

today got back physics test results. scorewise i would be 3rd in class, but positionwise prolly 4th cos theres presumably two seconds. top score 41/45. my score - 39/45.

later in the day, i found someone to play tennis with xD but that wasn't the best part. later, there was 45 mins. i got insights into various pages of the book, and i explained one part of my story. one part which serves as a link to another story.. which could partially explain why that significant event happened. i also gained insights into certain sidestories. today's page of that book also appeared to have a major event. its just that i haven't found a way to decipher the language it was written in yet. care to explain? ^^;

i'm impressed.. someone actually managed to read and understand my description of my book. i once said.. actually, i said many times. u dont know me. but then again, maybe you peeps know more than i thought. i guess my language ain't allllll that undecipherable after all. but hey, its just the description. i doubt my book can be read without being part of the story, or me explaining it to you. heh xP

If you get there before i do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I dont know how long I'll be
But im not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
'Cause between now and then, till i see you again
I'll be loving you, love me

but then again, i was just thinking..

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

this is today's page. longer than most, but it was great. yeah, i had fun too. what about you? yeah, you did too. yeah, you. i still dunch get the octagon thingy fully.. like how to find it xD maybe we should y'know, just sit down sometime, look up and then maybe i'd get your point ^^; i think i'll get myself lost intentionally. =P i mean, you learn faster by experience dontcha xD

i wanna hold your hand..

walk side by side in the park..

never letting go.

xoxo;
10:36 pm

quite an eventful day.

first thing in the morning we get good news. DANNY'S GOING ON COURSE!! that means.. 4 free periods today.. and one prac. muarhar! then got chem results back. 31/40.. not too bad. there were at least 3 tops, with 32/40 at first. then chen juefeng.. crazy-ass-smart-butt chinese scholar.. go and argue another 2 marks. so he get 34 -.-;

during the second period i was inscribing on parchment. cant believe it la.. everyone was crowding ard wanting to know what i was doing o.o; then i took a call for 5 mins, by then the whole class was staring. lucky there was no teacher in xD

i read the first pages of a book today, and did my own, and passed it on.

and to you, who hath brought me ten stars in a pouch, thanks a lot too. i can imagine the toil needed to get that done. i owe you the moon.

today i also know one of the guys that will be there for me when i need help, when everyone else is against me. he'd prolly stand by me thanks, nxh =D

you know, i was just thinking, sitting by the seashore at night.. with a lighthouse in the distant foreground illuminating the dim night sky.. a crescent moon and starry specks on a black canvas.. its beautiful.. i wanna go. i wanna go for it.. two months. after the battle we've been fighting for 18 months.

xoxo;
5:59 pm

today was my 2.4km run.. timing taken for napfa test. i think i surprised everyone.. and myself xD timing - 11:22 =D i improved by a whole 50 seconds since the last time i ran. but i missed a B by 2 seconds -.-; okay. happy, but not as happy as can be. btw, congrats to everyone who wasn't expected to pass but did! today, only a few failures i think.. last time it was smth like 11 failures.. so ppl like alvin, joel, yen shan, yong hua, yida.. give urselves a pat on the back! you did very well! =D as for those that didn't pass.. well, work harder. u still got a few tries.. and u just missed by a biiiiiit.. so try harder, and dun stop. once u stop its harder to continue.

oh btw, ssk.. i beat ya by 40 seconds!! IN UR FACE! muarhar. its allllrite.. you cant always be top xP anw, just work harder. i'm sure you'll beat me again in time, sooner or.. later. xD

then i took back bio test results today.. 41.5/50. omg. elated. ecstatic. every synonym you can find xD this must be the highest i got for bio.. ever. o.o;

and today i got a chance to enjoy the embrace of life-giving rain. i LOOOOOOVE rain, just so ya know. but you should. xP when it drizzled, everyone went in. guess what i did. i sat outside. til the rain got too heavy, and i went in.. then later, i was hailing a cab for eugene sim and my brother.. by then i was soaked xD but it was great. geez. i looove rainy days.

yaknow, i was just thinking.. when my friends need help, i try to be there with them.. but when i need help, will they be there for me? just thinking. not that i'm having a problem or anything xD

as always, on rainy days.. my mood is.. GREAT. MUARHAR!


10.45 update - it actually rained twice today! i'm on a roll!

dont say anything..

not coz i dont want you to.

its coz we dont have to.

=)

xoxo;
4:58 pm

i've come up with another theory. rainy days lift my spirits up exceptionally =D

this morn.. i learnt how incompetent(or forgiving) my sch's discipline teachers are. my socks were way below ankle, my fringe was almost touching my nose. i was standing right in front of the queue, and i think.. 3 discipline teachers walked past me. they look here, look there, turn ard, look at sec 1, look here again, walk away. then come back, look here, look there, turn ard.. and the cycle repeats itself. guess what. none of them came up to me to say "ur hair's long, dude."

then ah du say tmr hair check -.-; so i went to get my hair cut. i look.. well, simply, put, i coulda looked worse. okay. xD its been.. prolly.. 2 mths.

during physics prac.. i've been given an inspiring picture as to what a real genius looked like. i had a prob wif one part of a light qn. angle i = 60 degs. i dunno the angle frm normal or frm the horizontal, so i go up to yen shan, and ask him. "u know rite, for light qns, when they say angle = 60 degrees its frm normal or horizontal?" he answered "frm normal la! all ur angles always frm normal." he wasn't even doing the same experiment as i was xD

two responses from looking at my bright pink wristband: "the pink's nice!" or "OMG BRIGHT PINK. GETITOUTTAMYFACE!" haha. i got xuhau to buy me a briiiiight pink wristband with the word envy on it =P

erm.. maths lately quite weird. a maths test on differentiation/integration i got 6/15 o.o; but the test in sets i got full marks x) 15/15 and transformation test i got 23/25 =D

gaze at the stars with me..

_______________________________

You are a
protector.
Yes, you don't like to kill people. That goes
against everything you belive in. It's not that
you are a coward, but your ideals and morals
wouldn't allow it. You are the typical hero, do
the righteous things, get the bad guys and do
it all legally. But just because you don't kill
doesn't mean you can't kick ass. And that is
what you do. You use your brain and your
strenght to do honourable deeds and protect
people you know and love. If an evil guy is
going to take over the world soon, it's you who
will get involved. You hate watching innocents
suffer, and love seeing bad people getting what
they deserve. You are probably also happy and
optimistic and work pretty good in groups. And
the friends you usually make are true ones.

Main weapon: Anything at all
Quote: "You only live once, but if
you do it right, once is enough" -Joe
Lewis
Facial expression: Smile

What Type of Killer Are You? [cool pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla


Morpheus


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
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You are the Spirit of Love. You think around
romance and are extremely compassionate.
Whenever you want something you can get it due
to your fiery passion. You can make friends
quite easily, because peopole are attracted to
your obvious good nature. You will have no
trouble in finding a life partner and will be
very happy.


Which stunning spirit of emotion are you? NEW AND IMPROVED! (amazingly beautiful anime pics!)
brought to you by Quizilla



Your Hidden Power Is Dark
Angel

You have a Evil and Demonic Soul. You use your
hidden powers for the evil of hell. You are in
constent war with the heavans for you want to
destroy the pathetic humans were they want to
save them. For all people see in you is that
any emotion expecially love is a waste of your
time but your so mysterious that people don't
know you do have a shy emotions that are kept
locked within you.

Gem Stone:Black Pearl, Eye
Color:Black,Hair Color:Black with
Grey Streaks that is down to your waist pulled
in a braid

Quote:You said you read me like a book
but the pages are all torn and frayed


What Is Your True Hidden Power? .::Beautiful Anime Pics::.
brought to you by Quizilla


Your element is Light: Innocent, beautiful,
kind-hearted and pure. You are so sweet your
almost angelic, you find joy in others
happiness and cannot stand to see anyone in
pain. You want to make everyone around you feel
good about themselves and if someone is upset
you can tend to become rather upset as well
which means you are sympathetic and raise
others above yourself. Being as kind and
good-natured as you are people have most likely
hurt you in the past but you pick yourself up
every time. You may look fragile but you are
stronger than most tend to see. Life is
beautiful no matter how you look at it and you
understand that people make mistakes, not
everyone is perfect. You try to see the good in
the bad which is a talent few posses, dont ever
let anyone change you. You truly have a
beautiful soul inside and a heart of gold.

I actually redid this one o.o; i got rain the other time xD guess i'm gettin happier =P
hmm.. light doesn't sound that bad.


you represent the hard times in life. you have a
hard life yourself and a hidden self many don't
know about.


What part of life do you represent? ( AWESOME anime pics ^_^)
brought to you by Quizilla

xoxo;
5:17 pm

smth i noticed - when my day starts out bad, it usually ends with me in a good mood xP today chung come in and we immediately tio meh. then it ends with ng pe givin us one period early coz she hasta go for course. and stuff like that.. so yeah xD but on the other hand.. if it starts out great, at nite usually i'm all "whatever" and "dont talk to me" and stuffs. weeeeeird.

yeeeah. i'm feeling like sittin in a field under the night sky again. it seems like, so fun to do.. especially if there're stars.. but lately theres so much cloud cover that stars are nonexistant.. o well. tomorrow.

weather today was great.. I LOOOOVE RAIN! but it was tooooo darn cold. freezing in class. freezing at home. freezing every living moment of today xD i thought they said global warming.. i didn't think global warming was like.. this? =P

sigh. its my sec 4 year and i'm like all, i dont wanna do my homework and stuffs. tmr hand in probability 10-yrs series but mine's lying somewhere at home.. dunno how i'm gonna get more than 20 like this lor.. CJC - 13 AJC - 8. rj how? die ler!! must inspire myself... must work harde-- hey, computer!!



You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves
your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling
he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss
that never lessens and always blows your
partner away like the first time.


What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


hand holding - you like to be in constant physical
contact with your special someone but you don't
want to take things too quickly.


What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


Your Heart is Blue


What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla


In your eyes, people can't seem to see anything
because your eyes are covered up by tears! You
are constantly hurt and depressed... No one
seems to understand how you feel because
everyone is scared to get close to you... You
long to be able to reach out and tell someone
everything, and all of your problems... But you
have no one to tell, or they just don't seem to
want to hear what you have to say. You've been
hurt many times that you don't seem to have any
tears left to shed, or if you do, they're an
endless river flowing... You've started to hide
and bottle up all or your problems and
feelings, hoping that maybe they just will go
away... You want company, but at the same time,
you're scared of it. Your sanctuary is your
room where you can just be alone and try to
throw away all of your aching pains. You're
dark and mysterious and people like you for
that reason. Even if you think you're all by
yourself in the dark, someone is always there
with you. Your special someone wants to admit
and show their feelings towards you, but
they're afraid of how you'll take it. Get out
more and enjoy life because, it is far too long
to frown your way through :)


What Lies Behind Your Eyes?
brought to you by Quizilla


LOVING ONE. You need safety in your relationship.
You want to be sure in his/her arms, knowing
that he will protect you and you can be totally
devoted to your other. At this point you are
very vulnerable. You open yourself and dont
even think that he/she could cheat you. You
totally trust your partner in every single way.
SO if you find out that she/he lied to you or
played a game this trust is broken. You may try
to forgive your other but this will be very
difficult.He/She has to be friendly and
trustworthy.
PLEASE VOTE, I want to know what you think about my
quiz, I worked hard on it.
You can always message me or tell me how I can
improve that quiz. Ill sure write back.


~THE big LOVE TEST!! What do you need? With PICS! For girls and boys!~
brought to you by Quizilla


You're a very mellow, care-free person. Your
exactly what calm, cool, and collected mean.
You never overreact or panic in a bad situation
and you always know what to do. Everyone goes
to you for advice because you never lose your
head so your very reliable. You tend to take
everything in stride, like in school your moto
is just sit back and relax not to say you dont
pay attention and work, but you dont overexert
yourself. Even though people come to you for
counciling(sp?) you can still be very quite,
your not good with making new friends, but your
extremely close to the ones you have. Remember
its ok to put your emotions out there even
though there is a chance they might get hurt.
Also in school sometimes its good to stress out
a little, just because you think you dont need
to study doesnt mean you should'nt, and also
try to push yourself more even though you might
be good where you are doesnt mean you can,t be
better. Check out my new short story.


Whats Your Personality(with PICS)
brought to you by Quizilla


E:

Your Beauty lies
in Mystery. Captivating, mysterious and alone. You
are the girl in the little
black number that no one seems to know, the eternal
mystery girl. You make it a
point to never let anyone know more about you than
you want them to and do a
very good job of it. You're there one minute and
gone the next leaving them in
wonder of who you really are. A mature and normally
calm individual, quiet and
enjoy spending many hours of the day on your own,
most likely preferring night
to day . You love the dark and some may find you a
bit strange. You seem to be
rather distant and cold making hard for people to
get close to you, though you
probably like the distance they usually keep. You
probably wear make-up, but
concentrate more around your eyes than anything.
You know the effect you have
and enjoy keeping people in wonder.

Some Things
That Represent You:

Element:
Dark, Water Animal: Panther Color:
Black, Maroon, Dark
Tones Song: In The Shadows by The Rasmus
Expression:
Sly Smile

Gemstone:
Black Diamond Mythological Creature: Demon,
Vampire Planet: Venus
Hair Color: Black Eye Color:
Garnet

Quote:
"In the shadows for all time."

Where Does Your Beauty Lie? ..::Original Pictures Are Back! Detailed Results::..
brought to you by Quizilla

xoxo;
7:36 pm

put ur hand in mine...

today i did this 2004 chinese nov paper compre. it talked abt formless locks. it actually was referring to locks in the heart. translated from chinese, it said that if the lock wasn't quickly removed, it would get heavier each day.

but then again, if you removed it it would disappear by itself, not leaving a trace. it would leave you a pure heart.

consequences of leaving the lock there would be that you would become cold, unwelcoming and void of human feelings and emotion.

i liked it. was too deep at first, but once you understood, you'd understand.

i was just thinking.. emotion is what makes this world pretty. imagine a world where all you could feel was nothing. you watch birds fly in pairs and you say "ok" or "whatever". you get top in the level for a certain subject and you're like, "fine." you see your crush walk down the street, holding hands with another guy and you go "i'll forget her." then you just walk off like nothing affected ya. its very wrong. i once wrote a poem that went "void of feelings and emotion. paradise". it was a bad mistake. emotion makes this world.

i wanna gaze into your eyes..

then i heard this song.. with lyrics -

i dont know much, but i know i love you.
and that's all i need to know.

wonder when i can tell you.
but, who's.. you?

the ripe time has come and gone. opportunity was then, there. i missed it and i'm waiting again.

xoxo;
7:36 pm

another long day, whch was less "usual" than ytd.. its muuuuch better xP

morning wake up go sch.. was CIP day. omg.. we're paired up with 1-10.. sports class la. u know, sports class.. muz be damn attitude de lor.. so went there.. chung was damn pissed la. jerold accidentally brush past her then she scream at him "next time u watch where u walk! never touch me when u walk past me!" then zhiwen nv bring his consent form.. OMG! roflmao.. he was damn scared lor.. i think he was abt to soil his pants xP

IT WAS RAINING!!!! YAAAAY!!! but raining also means muz bring umbrella la.. bag heavy as crap.. but very cooling. collect newspaper that time no problem at all.. and the sec 1 peeps also very ncie la.. not what we expected. they were faster than us o.o; so by 10.15 my block finish liao.. but still hafta wait for the rest of the class lor.. so abt 10.45 everyone finish le. then wait for e truck to come.. what came was a small truck.. nt enuff for what we collected lor, so we finish the first load and wait for another one to arrive. 11.50 then come.. sianz. so we loaded that stuff, clean up then byebye.

go home was like, bored.. nv go out today coz got sudden change of plans xP so i play a bit RO.. then died. died as in sleep died. ytd sleep at 12.30.. then this morning wake ard 6.. will die lor. my nu er still ask me slp that nite and i didn't wanna sleep la xD so i died at ard 2 smth.. wake up at 6.

OMG we were supposed to be at theo's hse at 5.30.. btw, theo's my cuz. HAPPY BDAE THEO! 13 liao la, teenager le!! enjoy all ur teenagery stuffs. the white and pink band nice?

so we were quite de late lor.. reach at close to 8. then had dinner.. close to 10 went for macs dessert =P i took a $0.25 cone.. xD me = cheapskate. then when come back like.. nth to do liao. went up to theo's room.. then took a deck of cards. then i was like.. one deck of cards, two ppl. play what? then we started playing stress.. beat theo a few times, she beat me a few times.. then my brother came. OMG! he was like, irritating lor.. he play got some kind of unconventional strategy de.. he play slowly, let u finish all ur cards first.. then he play his cards one by one when u only have like, two or three cards left. and he can consistently win lor.. nth to say xP mervin was alseep by.. 12.30? dunno.

then left teh place at 1.40 am.. so here i am blogging xD sry to all those that wanted to see smth a few hrs back ^^;

mood = fricking great. no sarcasm this time xP

hold on a minute... sianz.. still got tuition and geog hw to do.. >.<"

xoxo;
2:05 am

got nuthin to talk abt today. sch was.. yeah, sch. as usual. no prizes for guessing correctly. then tournament was the usual. then come home was the usual. today's so.. usual. darn.

april fools', but nuthin happened. its a good thing =P felt so damn tired during recess.. i give up. theres nothing to say......... i dunno.

went back to ragnarok online t'dae. dled 1.4 gigs worth of stuff overnite for it.

ok. today's entry is boring. but so was my day. u endure 3 minutes of boredom, i endure 16 hours. i rest my case =P

leopards never change their spots, but zebras' stripes will change.

xoxo;
10:23 pm